[Web log message]. Retrieved from http://blog.staturesoftware.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/internet-addiction.jpg
Have you ever
been on the Internet browsing the web and suddenly see pop-ups of naked women,
penis enlargements, or live sex chats? Have you ever clicked on them? Have you
ever watched porn online? If so, how often? How often is too often? What do you
get out of cybersex?
“A vast network of millions of people with computers has
provided, for virtually everyone, a tantalizing new - Adventureland - in which
to experience and express their sexuality” (Boulware). Cybersex
is defined as the consensual sexual discussion online to achieve arousal or an
orgasm. Online sex is
available on more than half of all Internet websites we visit every day, making
it easy to come across.
Exploring the sexual world on the web is intriguing and
exciting. It can also be informative. I would venture to say that as kids, we
heard some phrases or words about sex from other kids that we didn’t know and
looked them up on the Internet after school. Strictly for educational purposes,
I’m sure. Or maybe a married couple wants to spice up their sex life so they
search for new ideas for the sack. This innocent excitement can quickly turn
into an obsessive compulsion or addiction.
Compulsive online sex can negatively impact your life and
your relationships. Many Internet addicts abandon their social environments for
the virtual ones. Most obsessive individuals will tell themselves it is not a
big deal or they can control it if they wanted to. That’s denial. Those who
have realized their addiction to cybersex “discovered their time on the
Internet pursuing sex was consuming a significant chunk of their work time,
distracting them from other activities, and pushing out, for lack of time or interest,
existing relationships or new relationships” (Boulware). It’s
extremely sad and tough to overcome. When the addiction becomes that deep, a
further evaluation by a professional counselor or a therapist is needed. Maybe
the addiction is a symptom of an emotional or psychological problem. There are 12-step programs available for sex addiction. One is Sex Addictions Anonymous, or SAA. Their website is www.sexaa.org. Many people find this type of program very helpful.
[Web log message]. Retrieved from http://www.amyoops.com/2009/01/cybersex-doing-it-wrong.html
Would you consider yourself addicted to the Internet? To
you, is it determined by the amount time you spend on the computer, what you
are doing while you’re on the computer, what you are giving up by being on the
computer, or all three? Whatever it may be, it is still a growing problem. If
you have concerns this may pertain to you, a friend, or a family member, take this self-questionnaire
below to help you evaluate the severity of a potential cybersex addiction.
"1. Do you visit porn sites or sex-oriented chat
rooms more than 5 times a week?
2. Do you use your computer at work to access porn
sites during the day?
3. Do you ever feel guilty, or ashamed of your
on-line sexual activities?
4. Do you keep your cybersex a secret from your
mate or partner?
5. Have you ever masturbated while watching
Internet porn?
6. Do you frequently erase your computer files to
conceal your cybersex activity?
7. Have you tried to cut down on the time you spend
at sex-related sites?
8. Have you been successful at cutting down the
hours you spend on the Internet for sex?
9. Do you feel anxious or upset when you are not
able to access sex on-line?
10. Do you worry that someone you know will discover
your on-line sexual activities?
11. Does it seem to you that your sex chat room
friends are more significant to you than your regular friends or family?
12. Does the time you spend on-line for sex,
sometimes interfere with, or distract you from, your real life activities or
responsibilities?
13. Has a chat-room relationship ever progressed to
phone sex, or sex in person with that individual?
14. Have you purchase sex-oriented materials or
products on-line?
15. Do you very much look forward to your Internet
sex activities?"
(Boulware)
If you answered “Yes” to more than
8/15 questions, the situation is problematic and professional help is
necessary. “There are a variety of treatments available from mental health
professionals, psychotherapists and counselors” who have good track records
with helping people regain control of their addictive behaviors (Boulware). Don’t be afraid to get help for yourself or family members.
Source
Boulware, C. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.summitnjpsychotherapy.com/articles-cybersexaddiction.trust
